Dear Nauseating Lovey Dovey

SEAN'S TRAVEL CHRONICLES: HALLOWEEN AND THE CITY OF TERROR.

Dear friend,

Have you ever been to the City of London? I have. It is a terrifying place. See, the thing is, that though I come from the slums of Leith originally, I am at heart, a posh Edinburgh boy.

It's true.

I have the voice, accent, attitude towards other cities, easy-life-idea of one. I am one. I am a posh Edinburgh boy without being posh. Large cities terrify me: they're just so FRICKEN HUGE. Also, they often feature the city plan of "grid". This is the worst part of all. Having only ever lived really in a city where every street is unique, when streets look the same I am completely confused. Even in Glasgow I get horrifically lost going down Buchanan Street after getting off the train/bus. I need to know exactly where I am to feel safe - none of this "Oh, I think I'm kind of over here in this kind of direction from the safety and warmth of all that is good and known in the world." 

I do not accept that. 

So imagine my absolute horror to be going to LONDON. The worst of them all. 

Me and Tom

So my Tomtom's mother is a very lovely woman, and I have met her the once when she came up to Edinburgh, albeit briefly; but Tom and I decided to go down to see her together and so he could show me his home (fraction of the) city. Initially the fear was terrible, but knowing that we would be there together and he knows pretty much everything there is to know about London since he is slightly sauvant about it all made it not so bad. I requested my first real time off work since May - joy joy joy. And BOOM. There you go. Tom gets a new job and he might not be able to come down with me. 

This is the point where you gasp in fright. 

So I am going to that godforsaken place on my own. We have the tickets and I have the time off work, and young-free-wants-to-see Sean decided that it would be a sad opportunity to miss. 

Wish me luck, and I shall keep you updated friend, in this godly feat that I shall be attempting.

Godspeed, innit bruv. 

P.S. I think I am going to come back speaking like that. Poplar bludd. 

P.P.S. If i do - kill me. 

TURRET

Dear Turret,

You are the most fantastic thing to come into my life in a long time.

(Long story short: Tom's new flat has a turret and it is amazing. We have decided that all of the Couchsurfers we have,  or visitors to the flat must be photographed in it)

Me, Veronika (couchsurfer from Ukraine) and Thomas. I
am aware I look slightly demented here

Me, Annette (Danish couchsurfer),
Lisa (German couchsurfer) and Thomas.

I think I just look demented in
all photos really. Me, Tom and Annette.

I love the turret. So much. 

Sean 

x

Dear Abandoned Blog

I'm sorry I'm sorry for not writing. I've been so busy with work 6 days a week (sometimes 7 if i get in a bank nursing shift too) and packing to move into my flat and all of that business.



Preparo a mudarme!


Caroline and I are moving into the wonderful flat on the 8th of July and I have begun to pack already. Everyone keeps telling me that this is in fact far too early to be packing, but then those people include Thomas who is coming back up from London on Saturday and has not even begun packing his things, but consider I have all of this to pack:

• All of my clothes
• All of my books 
• All of my other miscellaneous things as everything I take with me is what I have - I am only allowed to leave a couple of boxes of valuable books which I have inherited.
• All of my kitchen things (including my toastie maker, my coffee machine etc)
• All of Caroline and Kim's things
• The world and the kitchen sink

I've so far got 8 boxes full of stuff, and that only constitutes a small portion of kitchen things and a small portion of my textbooks. It's MADNESS! 

I have been stealing boxes from work to pack. It's so much
more fulfilling than bags!

I will post more photos once I have completed this endeavour. 

Pilar llega a Edimburgo mañana!

Tomorrow at 9.20am (eurgh, I don't do mornings) I shall be going to Edinburgh International Airport to meet the amazing Pilar otra vez! Es de Argentina y vivía en Edimburgo hace 5 años y estudiaba en mi colegio. She's coming to live here for a semester to continue her studies (law) at the University of Edinburgh so I'm going to go collect her from the Airport with excitement. She is lovely, and I have missed her. All of us who were in that friend group are SO excited about her return.

---

Update: She is here, and has been for like a week now. Also, she will be living in my flat with me until Kim appears in September! Yaaaay! 

Banter.


Everything is peerrrrfect. Thomas' flat has a TURRET in the livingroom, and he got me the cutest most useless present ever from London when he came back, which I will picpostspam about later. We have been living in a life of Simcity4 Addiction, cigarettes and never leaving bed if it is humanly possible, as moving requires too much effort for us studenty types. Amy has been locked in her room and is not allowed boys to stay (thomas and I: the father of her) and (Charlotte and Tyler: the mother of her) have decreed it so! She has put up a notice in her window as a kind of dirty Rapunzel who requires sexual attention. Thomas is a cute and very affectionate drunk, insisting on singing love songs to me while curled up in a drunken ball on the floor, which I duly recorded for my own amusement. Charlotte makes amazing pies. Heather should NEVER be allowed mountain dew. Onions are amazing. So are radishes. I finally have a pet name that does not sound absolutely cringeworthy (And by cringeworthy I mean cringeworthy) and Simtropolis is my life.


That is all.

Sonríe, porque

I thought I'd write an entry in the form of my personal "sonríe, porque" blog. Which means "smile, because". In it, I write reasons that I have smiled, or things that make me smile, then enter word vomit about my life. So I shall do one here, because I feel this blog is a little neglected.

SO, sonríe, porque...

Me consiguió el empleo!!!


Yes, I did. I had a CV day and went into pharmacies asking if they had jobs. The Lloyd's Pharmacy at the bottom of Leith Walk had a vacancy, so I applied for it. Sadly, I didn't hear anything back from them, so I continued dolefully working as a nurse. Until my sister said to me "Sean, did I tell you you have a voicemail on the answering machine from the pharmacy asking you for an interview?" 

THAT IDIOT GIRL!!!!

It was however, fine. As I phoned them up and they asked me to come in the next day for a chat (sounded promising) aaaaand,

THEY OFFERED ME THE JOB ON THE SPOT! MON-FRI!

It is SO refreshing doing it after nursing. Things I like about it so far are:

• There is no need to deal with large quantities of urine and faeces on a regular basis.
• There is no need to deal with elderly patients with dementia trying to escape the premises. 
• The shifts are not 13 hours long and they are not at night or on Sundays.
• The Pharmacy is like 3 minutes from my house. 
• The staff are lovely. 
• I don't have to wear a horrific uniform like the one I have for nursing. 
• The Staff are lovely. (infact, they invited me to some lunch thing on Sunday already, and it's only my first week) 
• I love being able to go into a place, and not be thrown in at the deep end every day (like Agency nursing is on principle)

Todo lo demás es maravilloso!

Everything else is wonderful. There is the very, very sad thing that Libby and Kristy are going back to the US forever to leave us. I have to go say goodbye to her tonight and I am going to be absolutely DEVASTATED. If my reaction to the Turkish leaving when I was in Madrid is anything to go by.  

(I cried so hard I got a massive nosebleed all over my white jeans)

Libby and Kristy. The family will not be the
same without you. 

So last night, it was Douglas' flatwarming, so we all got especially drunk to ensure we made the best use of our time left with the Americans. I will now photospam because it was a wonderful evening in its entirety.

Libby <3 I will miss you
SO much.

There is a perfectly good explanation
as to why this photo looks like this.
We just haven't worked it out yet.

Just because I love this photo of us.

y por lo último. Sonríe, porque...

Everything must get dark. Terrifyingly pitch black before you can see the stars. And when you see them,  hell, are they the most beautiful things you ever did see. 

Ciao,

Sean

Dear Sean Bernard Edward Kernan

Dear Sean Bernard Edward Kernan,

Well, you did it, you finally got round to doing it. It took you years to muttering up the courage to part with it, but you did. I am so proud that you managed to find the strength to take something so intrinsic to you, and something so part of you, and remove it from you entirely. Of course, it's still going to be there in the background on paper, though not required.

Well done.

You will always be remembered for being brave enough to finally do that which you always wanted to.

Lots of love 

Sean Edward James Stewart

The Rage.

Dear all illnesses and afflictions that have ever affected me,

Fuckyou


I sound like I am in a terrible mood right now, blog, and do you know why that is? It is because I am in a terrible mood. I have manflu, feel sick, and weak and feverish and horrible and barely lucid; but I needed to vent, because in such a state I am prone to bouts of The Rage.

Object of my rage today: UneducatedARSEHOLESONWEBSITESTHATSHOULDNOTEVENBEALLOWEDTHERIGHTTOFREESPEECH.

So on this gay website, this member posts a blog talking about how he has HIV, and how he in fact got it from his cheating arsehole of an ex rather than from his own "carelessness" as many people would assume. He talks about how he believes (bar condoms, obviously) Education is the greatest defence against the illness, something I entirely agree with. He is being reasonable and honest and helpful to all, then this ARSEHOLEONTHEWEBSITETHATDOESN'TDESERVEFREESPEECH pipes in "YOU ARE A WHORE AND WILL DIE A PAINFUL DEATH."

I got The Rage. The ignorant cunt.

My fingers are beginning to hurt with how much rage I am typing at him right now. I will likely say something utterly offensively raging and get banned (again: I was banned last week for getting The Rage at some racists) but it will so be worth it.


You know, The rage is quite fun, I should get manflu more often.


Actually, scrap that, maybe not. I should just get The Rage more often.


Ciao

x


P.S. Plan-quit-smoking is intensely painful... keep going through it sean... keep going.

Sushi and Beltane. Such an obvious combination.

Dear Friend,

Sushi

Did you ever have that food you were never allowed as a child? Or the food your parents disapproved of so you never ever even tried? Mine was Sushi. My mother thinks that raw fish is atrocious and I never had it. Until I came to uni. The moment I tried my first Cucumber maki, I was HOOKED. Tamago Nigiri, Inari Nigiri, Vegetable California Rolls, Avocado Maki, ALL OF IT (whichissuitableforvegetarians). Unfortunately it is a very expensive food, so I decided to try my hand at making my own. And as usual, I was excellent at it. So I made loads for myself and Caroline, and then loads for the Royal Wedding Celebrations at College Wynd, and have become quite the master at Maki. Nigiri is harder: I did it, but it was too much effort forming the rice base individually. I may cheat and buy a mould. 

First try at making sushi. Cucumber Maki

Cucumber Maki, Avocado Maki, Tuna Maki and Spicy Tofu
Maki. WIN.

Beltane

Since I was young, for some reason, the 1st May has always been quite an important day to me. This is not really about Beltane; but my family always inferred it was a day of rebirth or new starts in a way. My aunt used to insist we wash our face in the morning dew at sunrise to be beautiful for a year (to this day, I have not yet, though I am beginning to wonder...) and it was the beginning of summer and tending to gardens and vegetables and drinking wine out on the porch and sitting in the evening sun and barbecues and tans and everything else fun. 




So, last night I went to the Beltane Fire Festival Celebrations up Calton Hill with Duncan and met Kim, Libby and the gang and got almost burnt to death by the heat coming off the bonfire and watching the performances of all the people. It was really fun, and quite surreal. 

We had such a good view

And it made me think, that I should use this opportunity to have my New New Year. 


My dad had a heart attack the other day and is in the Aberdeen Royal Infirmary Intensive Coronary Care Unit, and it really hit home to me. All genetics considered, I have a shit heart. Well, as if I didn't know this already, given that I have an arrythmia at the age of 19; but it hit home that it's not "Only half of my genes are shit for my heart". It is both. I've been doing a bit more exercise and things recently anyway, but this has begun the start of a health kick, I think.




Customising My Mac Like the Faggot I am

I am a faggot for cute things and have completely cuted up my Mac. <3 Which, by the way, I have named Aurora. 

Also, on the note of cute things. I watched the film "Babies" a few weeks ago and it is the CUTEST THING EVER. But it got me all broody afterwards. Being a broody gay man is so not cool. (Itsois)

I have little more to say. I will blog about the Royal Wedding Celebrations and Caroline Kim and I deciding to go out dressed like the Mafia later on when she uploads photos. 

Love to all 

Sean 

xxx